What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!