"There's a woman trapped under a motorway bridge in Italy."
"Genoa?"
"I'm not sure, I can't see her face."
When I went to highschool in Italy my classmates were one year older than me.
I Skipped pasta grade.
My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.
Adios Omegas.
What is the capital of Greece?
G.
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
I hate to Gauguin, but I have to catch my flight.
So in my trip to Spain i got attacked by a bull.
Oh man that's spainful.
How come there are no automatic cars in Spain?
They’re all Manuel.
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?
Arisotto.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.
‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
Recently, i started learning Spanish
But i can't hola long conversation.
“Is this the Spanish word for ‘nap’?” She asked, pointing to a word on the page.
“Si, está.”
What is a Greek dog’s favorite dessert?
Barklava!
I asked my buddy if he wanted to know what the word “the” was in Spanish. He expressed his disinterest and I responded with...
"Your los."
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
What do Spanish phantoms say when they like something?
me ghosta.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
I checked my phone bill after my trip to Italy, and it said I spent DCXII dollars.
I must have left on Data Roman.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
Why is research more trustworthy if it comes from France?
It's Pierre-reviewed.
I’m in such a Henri to get to France!
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
If you were born and raised in France, what does that make you?
French bred.
I saw this beautiful tower in Italy..
It was a Pisa art!
Did you hear that cats have carried out a Coup in Barcelona and declared independence from Spain?
They're calling themselves the Republic of Catalo-nya.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
Can I go to France this year? Of Corsican!
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
I was at my hotel in Spain and wasn't feeling well.
Reception said they had a doctor on staff.
The doctor asked me lots of questions and I was then feeling much better.
I told reception I didn't expect a hotel would have a doctor on staff
They said it was a Spanish Inn Physician
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
Half of Italy is complaining about the coronavirus and the other half is laughing not taking it seriously.
All they do is cheese and wine.
If I were to wander around in Italy...
Would I be roamin'?
My local Italian restaurant is moving to Italy
They are moving to greener pasta.
How do Greek gods say sorry to one another
"I Apollo-gise"
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”
He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
It's only quarantine if it comes from the quarantine region of France;
otherwise, it's just sparkling isolation.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
What's in the middle of Paris?
R.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
Did you hear ISIS is spreading to Italy?
Nobody's concerned though, since it's just Italian ISIS and they're delicious. Especially cherry flavor.
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy
So it’s italicized!
What sound does a Greek cow make?
"μ"
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.
That way I could have math and feta cheese.
Why did everyone want to go to Italy during World War II?
They were Fascistanating.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.