I just got an adorable baby goat, but it can’t bend its legs.
The vet said it’s a cute kid knee disorder.
What’s a goat’s favorite TV show?
America’s Goat Talent.
Who did the goats vote for as president?
Billy Clinton.
Did you hear about the owl who married a goat?
The had a hootenanny.
What do you call an outlaw goat?
Billy the Kid.
I goat this.
What did the baby goat say to his father?
I kid you not.
Is a goat that eats office supplies on a staple diet?
What's a goat's favorite organ?
A Kid-ney
What symbolizes a goat’s family tree?
A goat of arms.
What does a goat call his girlfriend?
Bae.
What do you call a goat that lip-syncs?
Billy Vanilli.
What did the goat farmer’s wife say to her husband when he was swearing on the job?
“Not in front of the kids!”
What did the goat say when he woke up on a train?
I have no idea how I goat here.
What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.
If a young goat learns a martial art, are they a karate kid?
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
Why are goats from France musical?
Because they have French horns.
For goat’s sake, that’s enough.
If a goat grows a beard, is it a goatee?
You have goat to be kidding me.
What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat Stories!
Goat milk?
What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.
How long has this been going on?
Since I was a kid.
Two goats are married, living on a farm. Billy Goat says, "I really want children. Let's make some babies."
Betty Goat responds, "Heck no. No baby goats for me..."
"I'm not kidding."
What do you call a goat who is in charge of a university?
Billy Dean.
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.
How do you keep a goat from charging?
You take his credit card away!
Something’s goat to give.
What kind of music do goats listen to?
Baaa-ch!
What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.
What do you call an immature goat?
A silly billy.
Do hairless goats wish they had mohair?
When milking a nervous goat, you should use kid gloves.
Is a mountain goat a hillbilly?
What do you call a Spanish Goat with no hind legs?
Gracias
What do you call a goat on a mountain?
Hillbilly.
What do goats eat?
Goatmeal.
A goat came out of nowhere and headbutted me
It was a ram-done act of violence
Who called it a goat petting zoo...
and not Close Encounters of the Herd Kind?
Why did the ram run over the cliff edge?
Because he didn’t see the ewe turn.
Whatever floats your goat.
Young goats should be careful when they're out and and about and shouldn't jump into a stranger's car.
That's how you get kidnapped.
Did you hear about the mother goat telling jokes?
She’s a real kidder.
What’s the definition of butter?
An angry goat.
Did you hear the joke about the lumberjack, The sheep and the goat?
I wood tell ewe, but it’s a baaaaaad joke
What do you call a Spanish goat with no hind legs?
Gracias.
Why was the farmer angry?
Because someone got his goat.
I told my parents I wanted to raise goats for a living, but I was only kidding.