What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
What do you call a camper driving through frozen rain?
Van Hailin’.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.
Grate.
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
Ensure you save for the rainy day because even your closest friends can give you a cold shoulder.
What does a spy do in the rain?
He goes undercover.
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
It’s raining cats and dogs outside.
I think I just stepped in a poodle.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
Why is rain the best kind of music?
Because it has amazing drops.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
What happened when it started raining coins?
It knocked some sense (cents) into the world.
A little boy asks his dad, “Why is it raining? Is the sky sad?”
The dad replies, “Yes, son, the sky is pretty blue.”
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
It started raining coins outside today.
I guess it’s just climate change.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
Why do you never see owls being affectionate in the rain? It's too wet to woo.
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
The viking Rudolph the Red looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain.
His wife asked him, “What makes you say that?”
He replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
The only way bees can fly right through the rain is when they have their yellow jackets on.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
Why did Iron Man sleep outside when it rained?
To get some rust.
The winds of change started raining silver, copper, and gold coins.
I hope it doesn’t rain Halloween night.
That would dampen spirits.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
The best place meteorologists can stop to get a drink on their way home is the isobar.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
A man once said when is Monday coming? His wife said Mon-soon.
The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain.
One fish said, “Quick, let’s swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!”
When it was raining yesterday, I saw a man use ketchup and I got quite shocked. It is only later that I learnt he was taking advantage of the raining cats and hot dogs.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.