What did the horse reply when asked if it would try water polo?
“I would dapple.”
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land?
Docked.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse?
“Dis-mount is mine.”
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
Why did the horse like her new backpack?
The straps were adju-stable.
What did the horse say when it saw a sheepdog?
“Why is your furlong?”
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
What cartoon do horses like to watch?
Whinny the Pooh.
How do mares keep track of their boyfriends?
A stud book.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.