"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world."
– J.R.R. Tolkien
“Every day is National Donut Day if you put your mind to it.”
― Unknown
“An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.”
― Unknown
"Never order barbecue in a place that also serves quiche."
— Lewis Grizzard
“Everything goes better with tacos.”
― Rachel Caine
“I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.”
― Unknown
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that, five or six days later, you're hungry again."
– George Miller
"Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."
— Mark Twain
“My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.”
― Henny Youngman
"Without ice cream, there would be darkness and chaos."
– Don Kardong
“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
― Anthony Bourdain
"As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it."
— Buddy Hackett
"I just want someone to look at me the way I look at food."
— Unknown
"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people."
— Orson Welles
“Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.”
― Unknown
“My mind says ‘abs’ but my heart says ‘cheese fries’.”
― Unknown
"Wait. Why am I thinking about Krispy Kremes? We're supposed to be exercising."
— Meg Cabot
“Where there is cake, there is hope. And there is always cake.”
― Dean Koontz
"Carbs are the answer. No matter the question."
— Unknown
“Nutrition labels should include a “What if I ate the whole thing” section.”
― Unknown
"I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon."
— Ellen DeGeneres
"Life is too short for self-hatred and celery sticks."
– Marilyn Wann
"Never trust a skinny cook."
– Iain Hewitson
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
— Ronald Reagan
"When you see a couple walking down the street holding hands and laughing, you look over to your side and the only thing you're holding is a half-eaten sandwich."
— Violet Matters
“I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we’re having cake.”
― Unknown
“Little known fact, gentlemen. Tacos are the food of genius.”
― Heather Brewer
“I believe it’s a cook’s moral obligation to add more butter given the chance.”
― Michael Ruhlman
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
“I want to tell you about the "sausage principle." The theory says, "If you love something, never try to find out how it is done."”
― Unknown
"I'll have a double cappuccino, half-caf, non-fat milk, with enough foam to be aesthetically pleasing, but not so much that it would leave a mustache."
— Niles Crane
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”
— John Walters
“I’m glad I don’t have to hunt my own food, I don’t even know where sandwiches live.”
― Unknown
"Americans will eat garbage provided you sprinkle it liberally with ketchup."
— Henry James
“The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta.”
― Unknown
"If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger."
— Matthew Dolkart
“You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”
― Unknown
"I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food."
— W.C. Fields
“Love means never having to say “Should we get dessert?”
― Unknown
“I’m like Pacman when I’m at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.”
― Unknown
“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
― Unknown
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again."
— George Miller
"I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks."
— Totie Fields
"If I hold a can of soda up to my ear and listen carefully, I can hear my bones pleading for a glass of milk."
– Bridger Winegar
"I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight."
– Rita Rudner
“I thought I’d become an actress, but then I realized I eat too much.”
― Chelsea Handler
"Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!"
— Roald Dahl
“When life hands you lemons, give them back. You deserve chocolate.”
― Unknown
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt."
— Charles M. Shulz
"In these difficult times, when so many people are having trouble finding enough to eat, we are extending the “five-second rule” to a full ten seconds."
– Ron Piraro