Ready to laugh? Enjoy this witty and funny collection of short jokes and one liners that'll sure to make your day much funnier and MUCH better - because a day with a laugh is a day not wasted!
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. Love thy neighbor all through the day... but first make sure her husband's away!
An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist. 'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.'
'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.
'How long has what been going on?' said the man.
Innkeeper: "The room is $15. a night. It's $5. if you make your own bed."
Guest: "I'll make my own bed."
Innkeeper: "Great. I'll get you some nails and wood."
While I was working as an assistant in a large corporation, my boss used to take half of the job applicants CVs and throw them in the garbage. When I asked him why he just said: "I don't want to work with unlucky people."
Customer: "Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup." Waiter: "Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers."
It is well known... Man stands up to get knocked down, woman lays down to get knocked up.
What four animals does a woman like to have in her house? A tiger in bed, a mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage and a jackass to pay for it all. A guy asks his waiter how they prepare their chicken. The waiter says that there's nothin' special... we just flat out tell' em they're gonna die...
HUSBAND: "Shall we try a different position tonight?"
WIFE: "That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" She replied, "No peer pressure."
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
"I'll miss you."
A waiter walks up to a table of old ladies eating their lunch and asks, "Is ANYTHING ok?" Husband: "There's something preying on my mind." Wife: "Don't worry, it'll soon die of starvation."
|
Scroll below for more funny jokes!
Funny: The Heart & the Brain Can NEVER Be On the Same Page
These comics, by artist Nick Seluk, also known as The Awkward Yeti, show the eternal struggle between the heart and the brain.
These Cool Winter Puns Are SNOW Much Fun
Winter will feel much more enjoyable when you read our collection of winter-themed puns and jokes.
Sleigh Yourself With Laughs With These Christmas Puns
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. So, it’s time for some hilarious puns and jokes to put you in a jolly mood.
Cheeky Joke: The Doctor and the Stutterer
Enjoy this funny joke about a guy who wanted his stutter removed...
These Weird Road Signs Will Make You Laugh!
These outrageously funny street signs are certainly worth slowing down for!
LOL: 14 Dad Jokes & Puns to Make You Cringe
These terrible dad jokes are guaranteed to make you secretly chuckle.
Wives of Rival Politicians Fight on the Carol Burnett Show
This clip from the Carol Burnett show follows the wives of two rival politicians, who are friends in one minute and enemies the next!
Hilarious: These "translators" Should Quit Their Job...
This is hilarious!! See These Signs in ENGLISH!!
18 Terrible Sign Designs That Will Have You Bust a Gut
Feeling down? Well, after reading these 18 side-splitting signs, you will no longer have that problem on your hands...
Food and Humor Collide in These Cheeky Restaurants
These restaurants have a cheeky sense of humor!
The Funniest Questions About Retirement are Finally Answered
Retirement has many secrets. Here are some important, 'hard' questions about this phase of life.
Who Knew These Famous Figures Were so Cheeky and Funny?
The wittiest, most devastating responses in history. Warning! These are guaranteed to make you laugh!
Classic Comedy: A Newly Graduated Dentist...
Laugh your socks off with this classic comedy sketch from the Carol Burnett Show. A hilarious scene from the dentist that will have you in stitches.
It's Not Fun Being Old, But Sometimes It's Funny...
Let me make your day with these photos that made almost made me spill my coffee this morning.
You'll Never Guess How THIS Video Ends...
This hilarious short film won countless awards and endless praise.
Hilarious! The Joys of Motherhood - As Animals See Them
Motherhood may sound like a good idea, but it really takes it out of you, as these dog and cat mothers can hilariously testify.
HILARIOUS: 15 Dogs that are Having a Really Funny Day
New dog toys are hilariously giving dogs a shiny new smile that will crack you up.
These Funny Hospital Photos Are Bound to Crack You Up
These hospital photos are bound to make you scream with laughter!
We Guarantee That These Dumb Jokes Will Make You Giggle
Here is a collection of jokes that are so dumb they're actually quite funny.
The Wit and Humor of Groucho Marx – Funny Compilation
Sit back and enjoy this hilarious compilation of the funniest Groucho Marx insults and one-liners.
75 Hilarious Family Jokes Perfect For Kids & Adults!
While some of us might enjoy humor that's a little dark or dirty, these children's jokes are perfect for kids and adults alike!
17 Hilarious Quotes That Sum Up the Quirks of Traveling
Explore the world of humor through these funny travel quotes.
To Date this Hilarious Father's Daughter, Here are the Rules
While dads may be glad to see their daughter in love, when it comes to fathers and daughters, there are some hard line rules that NO suitor should cross!
Hilarious: Ready for Some Christmas Cartoons?
Here we've collected for you a series of funny Christmas cartoons for you to enjoy and to share with your family and friends!
These Images of Pets Returning from the Vet Are Hilarious!
Here is a collection of funny images of pets that have just returned from the vet, and their expressions say it all!
Signs That Aren't Meant to Be Translated Except For Laughs!
These brilliant signs presumably have more accurate meanings when read in their own language, but in English, they're just hilarious!
Collection: The Most Hilarious and Bizarre Signs
his wonderful collection will make you laugh out loud as we present you with some of the funniest signs you've ever seen!
Hilarious: Quick, Mrs. Brown, Answer the Phone! (Rude)
Mrs Brown's boys sure didn't think she would enjoy her new smart phone this much!
Classic Comedy: Mrs. Brown's Having a VERY Weird Day...
Mrs. Brown will give you a big grin with another hilarious scene.
Arrest These Designers! 20 Cases of Design Faux Pas
From ashtrays labelled with 'No Smoking' signs to lemons that can supposedly produce orange juice, you've got to see these 20 hilarious design fails!
Innovation or Insanity? 15 Bizarre Concepts
People leave you wondering where on Earth they got a certain idea that they had. These 16 photos really need to be seen to be believed.
These Funny Signs Excel At Stating the Obvious...
Some signs that you come across in life literally leave you scratching your head. Their messages are so obvious that they beggar belief. Take a look.
20 Hysterical Photos Taken in the Perfect Time and Place!
All 20 of the photos we’re about to show were taken just in time to create the most hilarious effect imaginable!
Hilarious: Have You Seen The New Senior Bumper Stickers?
Here are some bumper stickers specially made for the retired lifestyle!
20 Hilarious Supermarket Mistakes You've Got to See!
I used to think shopping was boring, until I started noticing these hilarious mistakes all over the place. Here are 20 of the funniest fails I've seen.
You Won't Believe What This Little Old Lady Gets Up To...
This hilarious prank involves a sweet old lady pretending to deal drugs in large quantities in a public park...
Classic Comedy: What's Your Name?
A classic skit from the ground-breaking British sketch show 'A Bit of Fry and Laurie', starring Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie
Hilarious: Then DIY Goes Ridiculously Wrong...
The world is full of wonderful workmanship, but you won't see any of that here. This is a collection of the very worst of man's DIY, construction efforts!
I've Never Seen Translations Fail This Hard
These hilariously terrible translations will make you laugh your socks off!
Enjoy a Hilarious Dose of Animal Pranks!
Enjoy a hilarious compilation of the best animal pranks by Just for Laughs
18 Hilarious Comics About The Everyday Adventures of Dogs
Enjoy these hilarious single-panel dog comics by artist Anthony Smith.
Hilarious: This Week's Funniest Cartoons!
Our selection for this week's hilarious comics, there's a lot to smile and giggle about on this page. So if you need a moment to smile, or indeed some solid minutes - we've got you covered.
WATCH: Man Ditches "Pregnant" Wife In Hilarious Prank
A man pretends to ditch his "pregnant" wife for another woman in this hilarious prank. Watch the video to see the hilarious expressions on bystanders' faces.
These Cats and Dogs Cause Complete Christmas Carnage!
You dog or cat might be the world's most innocent creature for most of the year, but as soon as the holiday season comes around all this changes in a heartbeat.
15 Hilarious Photobombing Moments That Will Make You Laugh
Sometimes, a photobomb can result in some incredibly hilarious moments.
These Funny Quotes Will Inspire You With a Smile
Let these humorous quotes about life put a smile on your face.