"I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," was the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman said happily.
A little while later she went into McDonald's and asked the counter girl the very same question.
The girl said, "I guess about 29."
The woman replied, "Nope I'm 50."
Now she was feeling really good about herself. She stopped in a drug store on her way down the street. She went up to the counter to get some mints and asked the clerk this burning question.
The clerk responded, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responded, "I am 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asked an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replied, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going...
"Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then, can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of her.
She finally blurted out, "What the hell! Go ahead."
He slipped both of his hands under her bra and began to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounced and weighed each one of her bosoms. He gently pinched them as well. He pushed her assets together and rubbed them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she said, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"
He completed one last squeeze, removed his hands, and said, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman said, "That was incredible! How could you tell??"
"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
Cheeky Joke: Meeting the Parents
A biker just found himself the perfect Harley with a tube of Vaseline thrown in to protect it from the rain.Things start to go awry at his girlfriend's house...
This Joke Starts With an Elderly Couple At a Travel Agency
Two elderly people are spotted by a travel agent at his agency's window. He promptly invites them in and discusses sending them on a dream vacation...
Hilarious: The Best of Little Johnny Jokes!
I'm always partial to a good Little Johnny joke, but when there's a collection of them in one place, you know there'll be people falling about laughing...
Why Has It Gone Hard? (Hilarious Joke)
Two boys are playing by a stream when they see a naked woman. One of the boys quickly runs off.
This Joke Starts With a Man Working Late
A businessman works late to be with his young secretary, but eventually makes his way home. He begins to think up his excuses...
Receptionist, You Must Come Quickly (Hilarious Joke)
A receptionist is alerted to the presence of a man outside the window of an old lady who's staying at the hotel. She goes to investigate the problem...
These Terrific Signs Make Everyone Burst Out Laughing!
In this article, we feature 15 terrific signs that will make just about anyone laugh their heart out.
These Chatty Parrots Will Crack You Up!
Talking parrots provide their owners with many hilarious moments, especially when they are in a chatty mood...
Your Smile Video of the Day
Watch this fluffy owl as it apparently pets a no less fluffy dog in friendship, once again proving to us that many kinds of animals can show affection, not even just mammals.
Small Town America Has Some RIDICULOUS Laws
It’s hard to believe these dumb laws still exist!
Need a Smile? These Hilarious Animals Will Bring It Out!
Simply put - there's no funnier comedy than animal comedy!
These Cat Tweets Will Give You Plenty to Laugh About!
Cats have been providing us with entertainment for as long as we have co-existed, and these cat tweets prove they’re still giving us plenty to laugh about!
These Guys Have Some WEIRD Choices in Christmas Sweaters!
Some people just have bizarre tastes when it comes to Christmas sweaters.
Hilarious: We All Have That One Friend Who's Kinda Silly...
In every group of friends, we have this one friend who just keeps messing up. If your group doesn't have one, then it's probably you...
These 15 Hilariously Naughty Pets Were Caught in the Act
These 15 hilarious pets were caught red-pawed and made to pay for their “crimes” by wearing signs of their wrongdoings.
These Wine Jokes Are All in Good Taste...
I never knew there were so many funny things to say about wine...
Babbling Babies & Playful Animals = Laughter Unlimited
This hilariously cute video will save your boring day!
Never Thought Bathroom Signs Could Be So Funny! (Rude)
These hilarious bathrooms signs are sure to make your trip to the little boy's or girl's room much more enjoyable!
17 Witty and Funny One-Panel Comics!
Enjoy this hilarious collection of one-frame comics by New Yorker Magazine cartoonist Harry Bliss.
The Funny Difference Between Male & Female Brains
If you're a man, or if you're a woman, you will probably find this video compilation utterly hilarious.
When Cats Attack, Absolutely Nothing is Safe!
These Photos are filled with cats going into attack mode and assaulting everything from their devoted owners to innocent cardboard boxes, blankets, and shoes.
Hilarity Ensues When This Ventriloquist Takes the Stage
Watch ventriloquist Jack Williams deliver an incredible audition in America's Got Talent with his puppet!
These Photos Are so Ironic You'll Howl with Laughter!
The pictures you're about to see are so permeated with irony that they are scarcely believable. Here are 29 of the most ironic pictures you'll ever see.
Don't Forget Your Hands - Hilarious Gag
People always say not to trust psychics, but I'll bet none of them have ever imagined a situation like this one!
Arrest These Designers! 20 Cases of Design Faux Pas
From ashtrays labelled with 'No Smoking' signs to lemons that can supposedly produce orange juice, you've got to see these 20 hilarious design fails!
This Hilarious Video Starts With an Elephant...
This is one of the most clever pranks I've ever seen
These Parents Have a Great Sense of Humor...
These parents have the best sense of humor about their daily struggles. So stay awhile and crack some smiles!
Read These Funny Night Quotes for Chuckles Before Bedtime
Read these funny night quotes for chuckles before bedtime.
Hilarious: Time to Laugh at Some Fresh Cartoons!
Forget everything today and just enjoy these hilarious one-panel comics by Mark Lynch.
The Funny Side of Having Too Much Technology...
It's crazy to think about how most of us have become attached to our cellphones, but there's a funny side to the whole thing. Take a look at these memes.
Only Senior Citizens Can Relate to This Hilarious Advice
If you're over the age of 60, you'll definitely be able to relate to these light-hearted statements.
Interior Design Fails: You Won't Believe This!
Some people have to live with really absurd home designs that make no sense. Take a look.
Hysterical - Wild Animals Being Real Comedians!
Who said all wildlife photos had to be majestic and serious? You have to see these 18 hysterical wildlife moments!
Hilarious: When It's Just Not Your Day...
These photos show spectacularly awful things that can happen to anyone. Let’s hope there was someone to give them a big hug afterwards.
These Weird Road Signs Will Make You Laugh!
These outrageously funny street signs are certainly worth slowing down for!
The Most Embarrassing Things to Happen on Camera...
A funny compilation of people who are having their day ruined by unexpected events.
Hilarious: How Weirs is the English Language?
English is a really funny language, especially when considering how meanings can be changed when punctuation's omitted. Take a look at these 9 hysterical memes.
These Driving Fails Will Have You in Fits
It's a wonder how these folks ever got their driving licenses, such is the ridiculousness of their actions. Here are 25 utterly hilarious driving fails.
Are You Old? You'll Know It If...
There is some debate about when you can actually be considered old. Let's make it real simple. If you find these funny, you are probably old...
Excuse Me, But Are These Signs for REAL?!?
Who comes up with these hilarious ideas and useless ideas for signs?
Classic Comedy: The Miracle of Birth!
This sketch puts a very funny light on the process of hospital birth. Thank goodness it isn't like this in real life... or is it?
Hilarious: You Can Only See Scenes Like This In AUSTRALIA!
Australia is pretty unique, so good luck finding photos like these anywhere else...
14 Hilariously Creative Doormats that Crack Me Up!
‘Welcome’ is certainly not the only thing a doormat can say, as these hilarious and unusual doormats show...
22 Hilarious Reasons That'll Make You Love Cats More!
These hilarious photos of cats show them breaking the laws of physics.
These Funny Signs Excel At Stating the Obvious...
Some signs that you come across in life literally leave you scratching your head. Their messages are so obvious that they beggar belief. Take a look.
The Empty Car Drive Through Prank!
Some people come up with the silliest pranks, but what do we care, we're the ones who get to laugh out loud at the bewilderment of these drive through workers, as a car driven by a ghost goes to collect its order...